Getting Settled in

[Kengi]

The past few days have been really rather cool for me. I am doing things for myself that I havent done in over three years. Really longer then that when I think about it, because while I was taking care of my Pops my life was pretty much on hold, then I got sick as well and all things came to a complete stop.

As I sit back and look on things there is this feeling that my life came to a complete stop and everything around me keep right on moving without missing a beat. Almost like I wasn't there at all. Even friends who knew what was going on in my life, they too moved on and didnt even stop to consider that the person who was once their “ACE” was hurting, but they were far to busy to care.

Right now it seems like I am looking behind me at the storm that just destroyed so much and I am smiling because even with all the destruction that I am looking back on, I am still standing, still smiling, still strong and the man my parents would be so damn proud of and the friends that I thought had walk off and left me are now behind me and there is no place for them in my life anymore.

It's funny how what I have gone through has made me so much better then I was before and how now when I look at the people who were once in my life, my thought is “WTF were you here for?” but in everything and yes even the things that we dont like, the tears, the heartache and pain, there are lessons for us to learn and grow from. So as I have said before I wouldnt change a thing if I could go back and do this all over again know the outcome, because it was all part of my path and my purpose. Morever it has shaped me into the man that God would have me to be, not what man would have me to be.

Please dont get me wrong, I am in no way saying I am anything close to perfect, shit I know that I have my flaws and my draw backs, but I am happy that I am no longer the man I once was and I am damn proud of the man I now see in the mirror. I am also damn proud of what I have set my mind to create even though my world was under constant attacks that were meant to destroy the awesome man my parents gave birth to and also meant to destroy the destiny and purpose God has called me to do. Even in the the wake of the storm God provided for me and made sure I knew I was still his child, still had his favor and his grace was all over me.

Each time I wanted to give up, God sent me just what I needed to make me strong and carry on. Even in the form of hate and evil, they were part of Gods plan for me. Now as I turn to look away from the storm of my past and as the chapter closes I am happy to see some awesome new friends who I know truly care for me and love me in spite of my flaws and short comings. Friends who will stand with me and will always be there to help me get back up when I stumble and fall.

Tina and Andy, you never gave up on me, never doubted me and loved me unconditionally. Provided for me when others only wanted to see what they could get from me. Not you two. You stood guard when I needed to rest and stood up to the forces that came against me. You made me smile when all I wanted to do was cry. You saw in me what my parents created and refused to allow me to give up. I am so thankful to God for people like you in my life. You are my family and I am so richly blessed to have you both in my life. With my entire soul I love you both.

As I move forward I know I will have two awesome gifts from God right behind me to help keep me on track and not me forget that I am awesome and I am one in a million and what God created in me, he didnt create in anyone else. I am an original. Thanks for seeing past my flaws and loving me.

I also see so many other new friends and I am smiling because I know that you all are answers to my prayers. I am happy to be moving forward with great new people in my life. People who love me for who I am, not for what they want me to be. Thanks to all my new friends and you all know who you are

[Kengi]

Thanks so much Fo!!!!!

I am missing you so much, so lets set a time where we can SKYPE with each other. I am so excited and I am so happy inside my new place. It is biter sweet, as you will see from tonights blog and my vlogs.

I love you

[Forah]

You deserve everything and more sweet bro (: I enjoyed the video "monday - Good morning", I could feel your happiness and just wanted to give u a hug. How exciting is this (: You're apartment looks great! take care for now xoxox